Attitude Check

I don't like going to the gym. I don't even love going to the gym. I NEED to go to the gym! On Sunday, I felt so anxious on the way to the gym that by the time I got there, I was near tears. Yesterday there weren't tears but I literally made the statement to someone that if I could quit my job to be at the gym I would. Those words and with the enthusiasm I said them with had me doing a heart check as I loaded the bar with 45 pound plates for my back squat.

Usually people who say those words hate their job but I used to love my job. I'm a middle school teacher which is a rewarding job that adds value to children's lives. I used to say it was a calling not just a job and it has been for the last eleven years. So, what happened?

As I added another 15 pound plates to the 125 pounds, I felt conviction. Here I am going into this session of the workout knowingly adding extra pounds to a bar so I can reach my maximum back squat (go until it's so difficult I can't do anymore) yet I'm not using the same strategy for my job that has become very challenging this year.

Attitude: a feeling or opinion about something or someone, or a way of behaving that is caused by this.

Due to reviewing a previous blog I entitled It's All in the Mind, it was clear... my attitude sucks and it started with my thoughts. I can go into a workout that has 9 rounds of pull-ups, kettle bell swings and wall balls with three runs telling myself that I got this and I can do hard things but when faced with having to change my whole teaching strategy due to a myriad of crazy in the class, I'm telling myself that since it's too challenging, I should be done with this which in turn leads to a defeated attitude and dare I say my behavior has been affected.

Do everything without grumbling or arguing, Philippians 2:14

My need for the gym is real and not just so I can work off frustrations and get my burn on but because everything I'm learning there when it comes to skills and thought process translate to my whole life. It gives me time to feel and reflect and time to work on changing my attitude:)